My primary, and let’s face it, only, resolution for 2006 should be: Be more diligent in my writing. (Why overload with a list of 10 or 20 when one is hard enough?) This means more writing, more queries, more submissions, and of course, more blog entries (notice how special you all are to me?). So to that end, as of 1/9/06, I have not written anything, not queried anyone, not submitted anything, and have waited until the ninth day of the new year to post my New Year Resolution blog entry. See, it’s all going according to plan!
My friends, why do we make these resolutions? Huh? Whose idea was this? We just came off of the holiday season, fatter, lazier, and more hung over then we were all year. Is this really the right time to make resolutions? Are we really in the right frame of mind for this?
Right now, I just want that big fiery ball of gas (not my boss) to stop stabbing my ocular nerves with those piercing rays everyone always seems so happy to see. I can’t focus. On top of that, my shirt smells like a mixture of cocktail sauce, onion dip, and berrwinerum. And the world wants resolutions?!
Okay world, how about these? I think I can do these:
- I resolve to shower today.
- I resolve to stop drinking beerwinerum (at least in the quantities required by the holidays).
- I resolve to stop eating dip for breakfast.
These, I think, are realistic goals. Why start out a new year with goals that I can’t achieve? This just makes the whole rest of the year so depressing, which causes me, by the end of it, to party too much in an effort to forget a year’s-worth of weak resolve. Which puts me right back where I started – stinky and hung over. You see? It’s a vicious cycle.
I need a self-esteem boost in 2006, not another failure. But of course, I do need to write more, query more, submit more, and blog more, so I guess I better add this to my list.
In the mean time, I need to eat some breakfast. Pass the dip?
